AMERICA’S GOT TALENT has officially gone to the dogs. And the crying kids. And the geriatric rappers.
Yes, folks, night one of the New York auditions had a little something for everyone — heck, there was even a guy whose entire act was getting kicked in the family jewels.
The most impressive act — by far — was a pair of father and son dog trainers for Houston called Olate Dogs. Their half dozen dancing, hopping, back flipping canines whipped the roomful of normally jaded New Yorkers in to a frenzy and had the judges gushing the kind of over-the-top superlatives you usually only get from the folks on AMERICAN IDOL.
“This is the most amazing, best animal act I have ever seen,” Howie Mandel exclaimed before Howard Stern, as usual, took control of the floor.
“”I am thinking of bring you to my house,” the Judge of All Talent said. “My dog does nothing! I am not asking for backflips. I just want him to follow me around… Every Nudnik who has a pet come out on my stage. You guys are probably going to get to be on my stage for a long time.” We agree.
Didn’t catch the show? Here’s what else you missed:
Mir Money, 7 (Rapper)
Howard’s best attempts to be gentle and compassionate completely backfired and the show went momentarily off the rails when the young emcee broke down in tears at center stage. Overwhelmed, Howard jumped up on stage to console the shocked and heartbroken first grader.
“You are a terrific young man. You are so brave,” he said. “I am gonna be honest with you. I don’t want to make you cry. I have met many great rappers. I am on the radio and I interview them. None of them are quite as great as you.”
Unfortunately for Mir Money, this was the end of the road.
Horse, 25 (stunt man)
Now this is an act you don’t see every day — but Howard kind of wishes he did. Horse, a father of two from Harrisburg, PA, spends 90 seconds getting kicked, socked and slammed with objects in the groin. He even lets Nick Cannon get in a shot or two.
“When I was growing up, I would fight with my little brother,” he reveals. “He would kick me in the nuts and I realized it didn’t do anything.”
Howard admits he is a fan of Jackass and The Three Stooges, so he loves these guys. “One thing about the Jackass guys, they always leave you laughing,” he says. “We were laughing through that whole thing.”
On to Vegas.
Burton Crane, 77 (Rapper)
Granny G may have some competition. Or at least a duet partner.
Burton, a former school teacher and amateur boxer from Manhattan, says he has written over 100 songs and calls himself “The grandfather of rap.”
His selection for tonight – “Whatcha Gonna Do?” — won’t win any Grammy Awards, but you may have trouble getting it out of your head.
Howard admits he expected to hate this guy at first. “I was gonna hit my buzzer,” he says. “Then all of a sudden I find my self (singing) “What you gonna do?” I say you are pretty talented. I have a feeling America might be singing that tomorrow. And that is going to be really strange.”